DIS week: Maybe This Is Love

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Did you watch that lady gaga muppet special thing? Neither did I. Here are some other things I don’t care about this week:

Black Friday: Happy Black Friday! Which in itself is an oxymoron, but whatever. Hope you got that thing you wanted for that really good price. Hope it was worth it standing in the cold holding that sad latte while I was inside on my 4th serving of pumpkin pie. Hope all your dreams came true. Unfortunately, this isn’t the case for some Black Friday shoppers, and Black Friday Death Count is here to remind you why this Friday is especially black. I know, its #dark, but like…

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Bae u Nasty: Don’t get me wrong, I love Instagram – mostly because I love a good caption. But with the *~holiday season~* now official here & here to stay, we can expect an increased slough of horrible food pics (foodstagrams? idek anymore) on our feed. Thankfully, the account Cooking For Bae is keeping a diligent record of the nastiest food on the IG – I literally vomited the minute I saw the account. Hopefully they’ll be gracious enough to spare Martha Stewart a spot on the list because as we all know she is #immaculada #cannotbetouched an #angel from #heaven.

Ask Jeeves: One of the worst parts about any family reunion (with or without turkey) is the questions: Where your boyfriend at? What you doin with your life? Why you so fat? (Don’t pretend like this is just me okay). Well the internet exists for one reason, and that is to help YOU get MARRIED. But before we talk about the ring, here’s some awesome advice from our friends from internet on dating, dressing, and waking up:

10 reasons to date a fashion girl

5 reasons to date a girl with an eating disorder

23 Trends Men Hate (but women love!!!) 

23 Signs You’re A Morning Person [Ok maybe this is unrelated but this article is probably the most irrelevant thing I’ve ever read and I just needed to share it with everyone. Also what is this creepy obsession with the number 23, internet?]

Got all of that? Good. Well, according to this Facebook data, I’m not getting married save a boyfriend anytime soon, so good luck to you and yours I GUESS.

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#FF: For my lil’ latkes – Happy Hanukkah!! Here’s a present from me to you on this 3rd cRaZy NiGhT of Lights: Porn 4 Jews. Yo that bagel is making me feel some kind of way…

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And for the rest of you non-chosen people, ugly renaissance babies. That way I felt seconds ago has completely escaped me, so thank you 14th – 17th century Europe.

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True Love: And to round out this week, a side by side comparison of the masterpieces that are Bound 2 and Bound 3. I don’t know about you but I loved both of them, and so did this person. At least I think he did. And apparently so did Kanye. So maybe we can all be friends after all?

 

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